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Not about me

Sunday’s Monday

This has turned out to be a very motivational week for me, as I have made several new acquaintances which lead to some deep biblical conversations. Brother Night North was smashing in every area! God has sent many to meet my needs and me to meet theirs. Love my brother’s! House restored from accident, thank you Jesus.

I have been involved in or overheard several conversations this week, with the subject matter of problems, trusting and praying. There seems to be a gap or delusion about God’s chosen and the wisdom of understanding which God has gifted to them. I chose at a very early age to handle any and all my problems on my own, to prove that I was a man and that is what a man is supposed to do. “Wrong!” Nothing could have been farther than the truth. This is some more of that stuff which the world drills in the young to add to the confusion and frustration as they grow older. Even Christians teach their children the values of being a strong independent individual who can succeed on their own. As best as I can remember I was never taught the value of Proverbs 28:26 ESV, whoever trusts in his own mind is a fool, but he who walks in wisdom will be delivered. I became the perfect prey for that old adage (truth), if you keep doing what you’ve always done, you’ll keep getting what you’ve always got. For those of us that lax wisdom, a poor choice is usually the best we can muster. I was (as is the majority of people today) living from mistake to mistake, dollar to dollar with no hope in site. My catastrophe was always greeted with misery in-which made great for my pity party. Oh, I prayed! I used my most “holey” prayers (not misspelled, prayers were hollow), I cried out to God, with meaningless words and a hard heart, I even tried to cut Him deals. Nothing worked! I was in a catch 22, as my pride would not allow me to seek Christian guidance and my problems would not go away. I just knew in the very depts of my heart, that should I trust anyone with the situations, feelings and thoughts of the real me that I would be shamed beyond my endurance. I had only ever met on person that I could tell everything and that was my mom, (she was a good secret keeper). But mom died and left me to my own devices, in which (in my eyes) left me nowhere to turn. By now, one must be wondering where this is going, well, I said all of this to bring out God’s Good News. It was during a TV show early one morning when this scripture “hit me,” John 14:16 ESV, and I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Helper, to be with you forever. At the end of my rope, with absolutely nothing to lose, I asked God, “where is this helper, will he help me?” There were no booms of thunder, no flashing lightening, no sighs of relief but my life immediately started on a road to recovery. I knew down in my core that God loves me and that He would help me, to the very limits of my allowance. Even at that moment of rescue, with my mind still in its warped condition, my decision-making process had changed. Pride was finding a backseat in hope of a better way of life, fear was dwindling in the light of truth and best of all the world was losing its victory. 1 John 5:14 ESV, and this is the confidence that we have toward him, that if we ask anything according to his will he hears us, is a great guide for my remembrance tool, in that my existence, is not, nor has it ever been, about me. The reason for everything created is explained in, Colossians 1:16 (ESV), for by him all things were created, in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities—all things were created through him and for him. For Him being the key here, I am created by Him, for Him! Which for me, was hard to grasp because I had to face the fact that my life is no different from anyone’s. I may be unique in God’s plan for me, but life is life! I can’t commit a sin that hasn’t been committed, I can’t have a thought that hasn’t been had, I can’t face a situation that hasn’t been faced. Ergo in the scheme of sanity, why would I have a need to hide to hide anything and why would I ever wish to struggle alone? God has a human waiting to guide you toward a better way of life, so that God can teach you to receive instructions from the Holy Spirit! Been there, doing that and love it!



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